Beans, Beans

A couple of versions of the classic, going back to at least the 1950s, and I’d venture a guess that they go back further:

From Brent B via Kay Shapero:

Beans, beans the musical fruit
The more you eat the more you toot
The more you toot the better you feel
So eat them beans for every meal

Southern California, ’70s

From Rachel Force via Kay:

Beans, beans
They’re good for the heart
The more you eat, the more you fart
The more you fart the better you feel
So eat beans with every meal!

Minnesota, circa 1990s

Kids in the UK expanded a bit more, accordion to Iona Opie in the 70s:

Beans, Beans, are good for your heart
beans, beans, make you fart
apple crumble makes you rumble
custard powder makes it louder

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12 Comments

  1. Herbaltablet

    Hello,

    This post has reminded me of another wind-related rhyme (though not connected with beans) from my primary school days in Nuneaton, Warwickshire, England (between 1985 and 1992). Apologies if it has already been posted elsewhere on the site.

    Incidentally, the first four lines were also used in the first Austin Powers film, if I recall correctly.

    Said after belching (or occasionally farting):

    Pardon me for being so rude,
    It was not me, it was my food.

    Usually, the following lines were also added:

    It just popped up to say hello,
    But now it's gone back down below.

    and/or:

    If it were to cross my heart,
    It surely would have been a fart.

    Reply
  2. Anonymous

    iknow this one

    Apple Crumble makes me rumble,
    Makes my heart go 2, 4, 6, 8
    Not because your dirty,
    Not because your clean
    Not because you kissed a boy behind a magazine

    Reply
  3. Anonymous

    Apple Crumble makes me rumble,
    Makes my heart go 2, 4, 6, 8
    Not because your dirty,
    Not because your clean
    Not because you kissed a boy behind a magazine
    Hey boy u wanna fight here comes Natasha with her knickers on tights.
    She can walk.
    She can talk,I bet she cannot do it with here eyes wide shut

    Reply
  4. Anonymous

    Apple crumble makes me rumble,
    makes my heart go 2,4,6,8
    not beacuse your dirty,
    not beacuse your clean,
    not beacuse you kissed a boy behind a magazine
    hey boy want a fight,here come …..with her knickers on tight
    she can walk,she can talk,she can do anything
    but can she do it with her eyes shut ….

    Reply
  5. Anonymous

    I only heard the fist 2 lines of this in the mid 1970's on Long Island

    Reply
  6. Anonymous

    I heard from my dad
    Beans beans, the magical fruit
    The more you eat the more you toot
    The more you toot the better you feel
    So let's have beans for every meal!

    Boston, Mass. 1960's

    Reply
    1. HotWax93

      My grandma says it the same way, only with musical instead of magical in the first line.

      Reply
  7. Karen Connelly

    Beans, beans, they're horrible stuff
    The more you eat, the more you fluff
    The more you fluff, the more you eat
    The more you sit on the toilet seat

    (I made this one up and sang it to my friends at school and they cracked up)

    Reply
  8. Jeffrey Young

    Another Michigan schoolyard song from the sixties.

    beans, beans, the musical fruit
    the more you eat the more you toot
    the more you toot the better you feel
    so let's have beens with every meal!

    Reply
  9. Irene Hogan

    Beans beans good for your heart
    The more you eat the more you fart
    The more you fart the more you eat
    The more you sit on the toilet seat
    If you don't have any toilet paper
    Just use your finger as a scrapper

    Reply
  10. Steve Moser

    Another variation on the theme from western Oregon in the late 1960s:

    Daddy ate some beans
    The beans were loaded
    Daddy went to bed
    The beans exploded
    Off went the covers, off went the sheet
    Fifty yard dash to the toilet seat
    The very next day on the radio was heard
    Eskimo killed by a flying turd

    Reply
  11. darryl

    my dad used to sing…

    Give the salami
    To the boys in the Army
    “Cuz the Navy gets the gravy
    And the Marines
    Get the beans, beans, beans, beans…
    They’re good for your heart
    The more you eat
    The more you fart
    Beans, beans, beans, beans…

    Reply

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