Here Comes ____ Floatin’ Down the Delaware

Tune of “The Old Gray Mare.” Or, if you prefer, “Greasy Grimy Gopher Guts” :

Here comes (insert name here) floatin’ down the Delaware
chewin’ dirty underwear
couldn’t find another pair
five days later, eaten by a polar bear
poor old polar bear

Several very minor variations have been going around since at least the 1950s. This is often coupled with a Row Row Row Your Boat Parody about killing the teacher.

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9 Comments

  1. Anonymous

    Philadelphia, PA 1960's:
    Here coms ______ floating down the Delaware,
    Chewing on his underware,
    Couldn't afford another pair,
    3 days later eaten by a polar bear
    & that was the end of ______'s underwear.

    Reply
  2. Anonymous

    BROOKLYN,NY 1960'S

    OMG!!!

    I SANG THIS SONG AS A YOUNG YOUNG CHILD!!
    I WOULD INSERT THE NAME OF WHOEVER I WAS UPSET WITH…LOL…MY FAMILY TEASED ME ABOUT THIS FOR YEARS…DONT REMEMBER HOW I LEARNED IT…I WAS VERY SMALL….IM 49 YRS OLD NOW!!!..WOW…WHAT A GREAT MEMORY…I TEASED MY CHILDREN WITH THIS SONG BY USING PEOPLE THAT THEY LIKED!!!..HAHAHA.

    Reply
  3. Anonymous

    Central Minnesota, 1970's

    There goes ______ floating down the Delaware
    Chewing on her underwear
    Can't afford another pair
    Ten days later eaten by a polar bear
    Here's why the polar bear died

    Because ______ is a nut
    She has a rubber butt
    And every time she turns around
    She goes putt putt

    Reply
  4. EasyWriter

    Sauk City, WI, mid '70's

    There goes __________ floating down the Delaware
    Chewing on her underwear,
    Can't afford another pair.
    Two weeks later, bitten by a teddy bear
    And that was the end of her!

    Reply
  5. M.H.L.C.

    Clarksville, TN.

    There goes ______ floating down the Delaware,
    Chewing on his underwear,
    Couldn't buy another pair.
    Six weeks later eaten by a polar bear,
    Polar bear died of rabies.

    Reply
  6. Chris Dyer

    Southwest Wisconsin, mid-70's

    There goes _____ floatin' down the Delaware
    Chewin' on his underwear
    Can't afford another pair
    Ten days later
    Eaten by an alligator
    That's how the alligator died.

    Reply
  7. Boo

    Got this version from a friend

    Here comes _______ floating down the ballpit Boo
    Chewing pairs of underwear that are full of pee and poo
    1 day later, jumped on by a kangaroo
    Never go dipping in the ballpit Boo.

    Reply
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  9. haley

    There goes ____ floatin’ down the Delaware chewing on his underwear, couldn’t find another pair, six weeks later bit by a polar bear, that’s how the polar bear died.

    Reply

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