Parodies of the song that ended Barney and Friends became a big hit in the 90s, enough so that Sherman’s book has a whole section on The Death of Barney.
I always assumed that the following was a Barney parody:
I love you, you love me,
homosexuality
people think that we’re just friends
but we’re really lesbians
The thing is, though, this was current on playgrounds in the 1950s along with “You Don’t Go Out With Boys Anymore/You don’t like Elvis Presley.” and a couple of others. Believe it or not, the 1950s were a boom time for playground songs about lesbians.
Most of the variations on this song, though, do seem to be much more violent, and generally do involve various ways to murder Barney the Dinosaur. Such as:
I hate you, you hate me
together we can kill Barney
one big shot and Barney’s on the floor
no more purple dinosaur!
Many of these songs went from playground to playground at roughly the speed of light in the 1990s, and have outlived Barney’s popularity. They’re connected to a long tradition of kids too old for a certain show slagging it off through song parody (see also: Howdy Doody)
Add the versions you heard in the comments!
Overheard from a kid in a New York City McDonald's, early 90's:
I love you
You love me
Barney gave me H.I.V.
Cause he was down with O.P.P.
The gritty urban version, complete with reference to the rap hit from Naughty by Nature.
Was it in Harlem? I remember singing that as a little kid. I may have been there that day, so that’s why I remember it, or someone else could’ve taught it to me. My late neighbor Elizabeth taught me lots of anti-Barney songs, but I don’t remember her singing that one.
i love you you love me let's go out and kill barney with a big shotgun and bang bang in the floor no more stupid dnosaur
hehe so fun
I love you,
You love me,
Let's gang up and kill Barney,
With a 4X4 we'll chase him out the door,
No more purple dinosaur
BC in the late 1990's
I love You,
You love Me,
Barney gave me HIV,
It Started with a kiss and ended on the floor,
I got raped by a dinosaur
I hate you
You hate me,
Lets chase Barney up a tree, i’ll get the flamethrower,
You get the gas,
And we’ll light up his purple ass
Oregon – United States
I hate you.
You hate me.
Let's get together and kill Barney
with an axe to the neck
and a bullet to the head.
We're so glad that Barney's dead.
I hate you
You hate me
We're a happy family
With a great big punch
and a kick from me to you.
Won't you say you hate me too?
(Palo Alto, 2000s)
LETS GET PHYSICAL!
Bristol, England in the late nineties.
I hate you, you hate me
Barney's watching MTV
With the shot of a gun and a bullet in his head
Sorry children Barney's dead
I hate you, You hate me
Lets go out and kill Barney,
With a baseball bat and a 2 by 4,
No more purple (or stupid) dinosaur!
In the 1990's in Newfoundland Canada 🙂
That’s the version that I heard too! I think there was another section about where to hide the body, but maybe they was just my school.
This was the one I knew as a kid. Shocking thing is I live in England and always have, kinda cool (and creepy) that the same version existed in both countries at similar times.
I hate you, you hate me
Barney gave me HIV
It started with a hug, but Barney wanted more
I got raped by a dinosaur
I hate you
You hate me
We went out and killed Barney
And we kicked his butt and we punched him in the head
Sorry, kids, but Barney's dead
(I made that one up)
I love u
u love me
let's chase Barney up a tree!
With a knife in my hand
I stab him in the head!
Sorry, kids, but Barney' s dead!
I love you, you love me, let's get together and kill Barney, with a bomb in his bed and a sword in his head, sorry kid's, but Barney's dead.
I hate you, you hate me, let's get together and lynch Barney. With a great big noose we will hang him from a tree. Sorry kids no more Barney
(Texas, early 1990s)
i love booze
booze loves me
holy sh!t i have to pee
i'm so smashed im falling on the floor
alcoholic dinosaur
Haha good one
XD
I hate you
You Hate Me
Lets gang up and kill barney
I'll get the fire
You get the gas
Lets blow barneys big fat ass
I hate you
You hate me
Let's gang up and kill Barney
With a kick and a punch and a bullet in the head
Look now kids, poor Barney's dead!
NY early 90's
I remember that! LOL!
Northern Kentucky, 1990s
I love you, you love me,
Let's get together and kill Barney.
I'll get the lighter and you get the gas,
Let's all kill Barney's purple ass!
-Texas, early 2000's
I love you
you love me
Barney gave me HIV
so I kicked him in the balls
and shot him in the head
now that purple basturds dead
I hate you, you hate me
let’s get together and kill Barney
with a one shot, two shot, three shot, four
no more purple dinosaur
lol i edited it :
I hate you,you hate me,let’s team up and kill Barney
With a sword and push it on he’s butt
Now he’s dead and butt hurted
What do you think of it ? c:
I hate you, you hate me
Let’s get together and kill Barney
Grab a fork and stick it in his head
Aren’t you glad that Barney’s dead?
– New Jersey, early 2010s
i hate u, u hate me
lets hang out and kill barney
with a 4 by 4 and a rpg
no more purple dinasour
New Zealand late 2010s
amongst middleschoolers
I love you, you love me.
Let’s get together and kill barney.
Bang with a shotgun, Barney hit the floor.
No more purple dinosaur.
I learned a different version in New Zealand.
I hate you
You hate me
Let’s get together and kill Barney
With a great big hug
And a bullet in the head
Just one shot
And Barney’s dead
– Southern California (Los Angeles/Orange County), early 2000’s
Nah, I heard the one about family
i love you
u love me
lets get together and kill barney
with a 1 shot 2 shot 3 shot 4
no more purple dinosaur
Learnt in 2007/ 2008, Suffolk, England
I hate you, you hate Me.
Lets go off and kill barney
with a baseball bat and a four by four,
no more purple dinosaurs.
Sorry kids, Barney’s dead.
I chopped off his big fat head
with a baseball bat and a four by four,
no more purple dinosaurs.
Michigan, circa 2005/6:
I hate you, you hate me,
Barney stole my SUV,
So I went to the store and I bought a .44,
No more purple dinosaur.
I HATE YOU HATE ME LET GO A COOK BARNEY,CHARCOAL,LIGHT FLUID AND BBQ SUACE TO,HAVE A DINO BARBQUE
I love you, you love me .
Let’s get together and flip Barney
With a spatula and a pyramid
Did we flip him?
YES WE DID!
I played it as:
I hate you, you hate me
You’ll never defeat Barney
Barney is my new friend, he is in my control now
Let’s go find someone else
– New Zealand, 2002
I read that in Swayzak’s voice.
Japan in seventh grade (2000)
I love you you love me
Barney’s doing hara kiri
Club him in the head before we get to class
And if you tell, I’ll kancho your ass
Look up kancho. Our version reminds me greatly of the ending of Barney the Evil Bus Driver, but I didn’t hear that until I finished high school.
I could write an entire paragraph about this, I used to hear a new Barney parody every day back when I went to 1st grade in 2002.
My personal favorite was
“I hate you, you hate me, let’s go out and kill Barney. With a 4 by 4 and a shotgun to the head, sorry everyone, he’s dead.”
And then I made this one up.
“I hate you, you hate me, let’s all go out and kill Barney. A Particle Beam will do! Can we infect TOM too?”
I hate you, you hate me
Let’s all go and kill Barney
With a one shot, two shot, three shot, four
No more stupid dinosaur!
I hate you, you hate me
Let’s get together and kill Barney
With a big fat rope tied around his neck
The big purple dork ain’t coming back
I love you, you love me
Space is where we sent Barney
With a muffled pop, he turned into
One big mass of a purple goo!
(Harlem, NY 1993-94, taught to me by my neighbor Elizabeth, the third one she learned from an anti-Barney newsgroup)
I hate you, you hate me
I’ll kill you with an rpg
with a great big knife i’ll put it in your throat
now you can’t come bother me.
Michigan, early 2017
i came up with this in 6th grade and it’s never left my mind, seems like it would have been done before but nonetheless here it goes
i know you
you know me
let’s gang up and kill Barney
with a great big punch and now he’s on the floor
no more mr. dinosaur
I hate you
You hate me
Let’s all go and kill Barney
With a knife and sword and blood on the floor
No more purple dinosaur
I heard this for the first time in fourth grade, in Oakland, CA. My friends and I were a weird group of kids….
I was talking to some friends (all from various parts of England) and there were a good few versions! I was also the only one to have a second verse including the Teletubbies. Mine (Oxfordshire, England, from early 2000s):
I hate you, you hate me
Let’s get together and kill Barney
With a baseball bat and a 4×4
No more purple dinosaur
I hate you, you hate me
Let’s get together and kill Dipsy
With a rocket up his bum and a bullet through his head
Don’t tell Lala Dipsy’s dead
This is such an interesting phenomenon, that across the world children have come up with roughly the same idea (with some verses even being the same across countries – apparently my first verse was also around in Newfoundland Canada!) but there are just slightly different permutations of it.