It’s one of the first taunts I learned – and the one that taught me the “taunt rhythm,” the meter and tones that make any song a taunt.
_____ and _____, sittin’ in a tree
K-I-S-S-I-N-G
First comes love, then comes marriage
then comes ____ with a baby carriage
The truly inspired would add on the following:
Sucking his thumb, pooping his pants
Trying to do the boogie dance
and that’s not all, that’s not all
he’s also drinking alcohol!”
Other versions I heard over the years changed the pronouns around – it was usually one of the people from the first section drinking the alcohol, not the baby.
This seems to be one of the rhymes that EVERYONE knows (I understand there’s even a Spanish version) – I’ve even seen it listed as a good rhyme for teaching Christian children in a home school as an introduction to sexuality (since it sets up the “normal” sequence of events: first comes love, then come marriage, then comes the baby).
Figuring out just how old it is is tricky – it didn’t start appearing in print much until the 1970s, though by then it was already referred to as an “old” rhyme. A version including the second verse appeared in Texas Monthly (swapping “wetting” for “pooping” and “hula” for “boogie”) in 1976, but in the context it seems clear that it was already considered old. A collection called Glimpses of Appalachian Folklore” lists it as a jump-rope rhyme recorded in Maine in 1961, and Western Folklore listed it as being common in California by the end of the 1960s.
What versions did you know? How old is this thing, anyway?
I've heard other things added California late 1990s.
After alcohol… (Or instead of sometimes)
That's not all that's not all I saw the baby playing basketball.
I haven't heard the two lines before the alcohol one.
Grew up a military brat- pretty sure I first learned this between 1960-1964 on an Air Force base in the state of Michigan. Which might help with the time frame but given that my neighbors had grown up all over the world *where* it came from is anybody's guess.
Like the other anon, I learned it in CA in the 90's, but never heard the second part you have. The version I knew was:
_____ and _____, sitting in a tree
K – I – S – S – I – N – G
First comes love, then comes marriage
Then comes a baby in the baby carriage
That's not all, that's not all
Then comes a baby playing basketball
That's not all, that's not all
Then comes a baby drinking alcohol (after which my parents would glare reproachfully.)
We'd occasionally make up other stuff to rhyme with "all", but those were the only consistent ones.
NJ, early 80's. Slight differences:
Then comes (name of person you were taunting) in a baby carriage
Sucking his thumb
Peeing his pants
Doing the hula hula dance
This brings back some embarrassing moments. I am not sure when did this thing actually begin but it is certainly not fun when you are in the end of it.
nappies online
We had…
Sucking his thumb
Wetting his pants
Doing the Hula Hula dance
Long Island mid 1970's
Oh gosh xD We had followed up with:
Here comes a baby in a baby carriage!
That's not all, that's not all,
Here comes a baby playing basketball!
That's not all, that's not all,
Daddy's drinking alcohol!
That's not all, that's not all!
Baby got hit with a beer bottle!
That's not all, that's not all,
Mommy's popping adderall!
That's not all, that's not all!
Mommy's taken quite a fall!
That's not all, that's not all!
Daddy's in the grieving hall!
That's not all, that's not all!
Baby now can't even crawl!
That's not all, that's not all!
Baby's still as a barbie doll!
We were weird kids. We kept building on that during recess and gym…we didn't even know what adderall was, but "Ken's mom takes it!"
I was on the receiving end of this in 1966 in Water Valley Mississippi. The version I heard was:
Tim and Sally sittin' in a tree
K-I-S-S-I-N-G
First comes love, then comes marriage
then comes something in a baby carriage
To which the girl then retorted: Right-o, Right-o, yes siree!
It was one of the proudest moments of my life *lol*
Then comes divorce
Then comes hate
Then comes baby on a golden plate
this was the end of it in London in the nineties/noughties
Coming from a large family (country to the bone, none the less) we children were, and still are, a bit obnoxious toward one another. Whenever one of us would talk about a person of the opposite sex, the other five kids would launch into a chorus of:
____ and _____ sitting in a tree,
K-I-S-S-I-N-G!
First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes a baby in a baby carriage!
But that's not all, that's not all,
Then comes a baby playing basketball!
But that's not all, that's not all,
Then comes a baby driving up the wall!
But that's not all, that's not all,
Then comes a baby drinking alcohol!
But that's not all, that's not all,
Then comes a baby playing ba-a-seball!
But that's not all, that's not
Then comes a baby making a phone call!
It would continue with whatever we could think of that rhymed with 'that's not all' until, in the style of Porky Pig, we yelled "That's all for today, folks!"
I'm pretty sure that last part was exclusive to our family, but I could be wrong.
(California, 2000s)
I like the Cyanide and Happiness version-
"Johnny and Marissa, sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G. First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes an abrupt, tragic miscarriage. Then comes blame, then comes despair. Two hearts damaged beyond repair. Johnny leaves Marissa and takes the tree, D-I-V-O-R-C-E."
Australia, early '70s, in the version I heard, well, let's just say the four-letter verb wasn't K-I-S-S…
…Get out the diapers. Get out the pins.
Oh my gosh, they just had twins.
Omaha Ne. 1980s
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I heard the "K-I-S-S-I-N-G" rhyme at school in Los Angeles, California in the mid-1950s, and I figured it was already old then.
_____ and _____, sittin' in a tree
F-A-R-T-I-N-G
_____ and _____, sittin' in a gutter
eating peanut butter
kissing each other
Newport News VA 1990s
in my school, its like _____ and _____, sittin' in a tree
K-I-S-S-I-N-G
First comes love, then comes marriage
then comes ____ with a baby carriage
that's not all, that's not all
the baby's drinking alcohol!"
_____ & ______ sitting on a log they both fell off and had a snog
me and my friend made this up :
_____ & ______ sitting on some decks they both fell off and had some sex
we were about 10-11 years old xD
When the diapers leak, they do it in one of two ways which allows you to troubleshoot a bit. When my baby was small, they'd leak around the thighs. Every time I put the diaper on, I'd slide a finger along the thigh and make sure the elastic was snug, no gaps. This helped a lot.
honest diaper
_____&______ Sitting in a tree!
K-I-S-S-I-N-G
First comes love!
Then comes marriage!
Then comes baby in a baby carriage!
That's not all! That's not all!
The baby's drinkin' Alcohol!
(WAY upstate NY, 2005-now)
Central NJ, 1983
[boy] and [girl] sitting in a tree
K-I-S-S-I-N-G
first comes love
then comes marriage
then comes baby in the baby carriage
sucking his thumb, wetting his pants
trying to do a hula dance
(my cousins in Wyckoff, NJ sang "doing the hula-hula dance)
My brother-in-law once recited additional verses that were totally unknown to me, which he would have picked up in Maryland in the mid to late 70's:
that's not all, that's not all
they were drinking al-co-hol
that's not all, that's not all
they were making out on the wall
that's not all, that's not all
they were playing naked volleyball
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Upstate NY 90's we had a variant
F-_-_-_-I-N-G
I heard the basic version all over the country from the late '60s through the '70s.
______ and ________, sitting in a tree,
K-I-S-S-I-N-G,
First comes love,
Then comes marriage,
Then comes the abrupt, tragic miscarriage
Then comes blame,
Then comes despair,
Two hearts damaged beyond repair,
_________ leaves _________, and takes the tree,
D-I-V-O-R-C-E.
Saw this on the internet.
Iona and Peter Opie, The Lore and Language of Schoolchildren (Oxford:Oxford University Press, 1959)
I found this as a reference on the K-I-S-S-I-N-G wiki which means it was around and probably widely known by the 1959 publication.
I'm only 4 years too late on this post!
I wrote more about this but it all got deleted
Adding more to your search for the origin! Maybe researching about where this couple grew up could help find new parts of the country where it would have been early on.
Huh! The version I heard (central Pennsylvania, early eighties) was similar to these, but with one variation I haven't seen here:
That's not all, *they were bald,*
Now they're drinking alcohol!
"Bald" was said to be a euphemism for "naked." Ooh!
That's the way I learned it too.
_____ and _____, sittin’ in a tree
K-I-S-S-I-N-G
First comes the love, second comes the marriage
third comes the baby in a golden carriage
Sucking his thumb, pooping his pants
Trying to do the boogie dance
and that’s not all, that’s not all
now the baby’s drinking alcohol!